Are you suffering from serious break up

Are you suffering from serious break up?

Then you should read this story.

I was in a very serious relationship. But at the end of the day, all it matters is ‘How you look?’ and ‘How much your would be in-laws likes you?’

It ended. We mutually broke up. My decision was based on future. I only wanted one assurance from him and that is a secure future, where I can see him as my husband.

Never demanded anything but when I did, he said ‘it’s time to move on and seperate our paths’

I understood everything, and without a single bad word against him, I left.

My mother taught me this

‘Never try to force your decisions on someone. If they love you, they will stand by your side no matter what, and if not, leaving them will be the best decision you will make for yourself’.

I did the same.

I struggled, he did too, I guess.

I cried till there was nothing left to come out from eyes. I begged for the pain to stop.

It became more though when I started living alone, the four walls started haunting me in night.

I wanted him back but I was not a beggar. And I am proud that I never begged for his love.

But this was not the story I was talking about.

My story begins that day when my close friend, tired of hearing my sorrows, my breakup stories, asked me to install Tinder.

‘Huh? Tinder, No way in hell’ I said, laughing

‘Go out, meet people. No one is asking you to get into a relationship now but at least give yourself a chance’ she explained

I denied and went back to sleep.

Her voice was back in my head but I knew how the app works, I heard a lot of stories about hook ups and various other things which was way different from who I am and how I see things.

Run away from that one thing and it will never leave your site.

Without being forced from her,

I installed Tinder. And I must tell you, it was the best decision I made for myself.

I signed in with my number as I don’t have a Facebook account.

Didn’t know how to use it, I started swiping everyone left.

It was not working according to my knowledge, I kept my phone aside and slept.

Next morning, as usual no notifications, I dressed up and left for office. While traveling to my work place, I opened it again and this time, I did total opposite of what I did last night. I swiped everyone right.

Whole day I was busy, but my phone didn’t stop with the notifications from tinder.

I peeked a little in between work and saw many messages.

‘Hi’

‘Hello’

Some with cheesy lines.

And some crossed the boundaries which I set for myself before installing the app.

When I came back home, after dinner, I found myself scrolling through messages. I responded with a simple Hi, not to all but to few who looked decent enough to talk.

Then came this notification

Aayushi matched Aayush

I looked at it again to confirm.

I didn’t initiate the conversation as I was afraid. I kept talking to few guys.

One or two of them were too nice. I told them my intentions for joining this app and they appreciated it.

It was already late so I wished them Goodnight and kept my phone on vibration mode.

My phone started vibrating, I was still sleepy. I took it on my hand to switch of the alarm but it was not alarm, it was Tinder notifications which was coming back to back.

My body was demanding to sleep back but my mind had some other plans.

I opened it, saw 15 messages from same person and that was ‘Aayush

‘Hey’

‘So Aayush matched Aayushi, pretty funny isn’t it?’

‘So you in Bangalore?’

‘Let me guess by looking some of your pictures , you are a sophisticated lady types but want someone to share your problems’

I don’t remember the rest of it but that message, it forced me to reply him back, something rude so that from next time he never judge anyone from the way they appears.

I replied him and he was awake to revert back as well.

We kept bantering, back and forth, at the end he slept but I didn’t.

It started with the heated argument, I found him rude. Next day, I kept it clear to myself that one more rude message from him and I will unmatch him for good.

Whole day, I received many messages but I didn’t open. I completed my work and was ready to have a nice weekend.

Later, when I opened the messages, was I disappointed?

Yes, I was. There were messages from others but not a single message from him.

‘I am going to unmatch you now’ I typed and without thinking, I sent it.

‘Okay’ he replied in few seconds

Something was there about him that was pulling me to know him more, to know why he is behaving differently from rest of the guys.

I decided to unmatch but before I do it, he messaged again ‘But before you do that can I ask you one thing?’

And me being me ‘Yes, sure’ I replied

‘Why are you so angry from the whole world? It seems like, it is you versus all’.

‘You are wrong. I just found you rude and I don’t have any intention to continue talking to you’ I typed

‘Pardon me but you are the person who is rude to me from starting’ he replied

I didn’t reply but scrolled up and saw that he is correct. He was nowhere rude but me, I somewhere crossed the lines.

We didn’t talk for days but we didn’t unmatch as well. I surely apologised for my behaviour but he said nothing.

I went to Goa, to celebrate Rakshabandhan. It was a reunion of my cousins, we brothers and sisters are really close, so it was meant to be great 4 days.

When I came back, I shared my number with two people. It was going really well but whenever they asked for coffee date or anything I freaked out. I told them I need time.

But Aayush, he was still there in the back of my mind.

I was not prepared to accept it but I always open our chat and read it.

‘Hey, there?’ His message appeared

‘Yeah, I have no plans to leave this place anytime soon’ I said

I have no idea how and when, but we became friends.

A little more to friends when I agreed to meet him.

He was my first and only Tinder date.

I was right about him from starting, is he crazy? Very much.

With no fancy dinner, he took me to local street shop to eat ‘Panipuris, chaat, Dosa’

It was hell of a night.

He was funny but I saw his emotional side as well. He told me, he had many hookups, not to mention but his ex still lives near by to his place.

When I met him, he was a whole new person, different from what I imagined him to be, based on our conversation.

After that, we met very frequently. I was not ready for a new beginning but I will not deny the fact that I saw me in him. He was broken too but he coated his pain with the smile on his face.

I learned that he is good man. I took my time to analyse everything about him and his behaviour.

He is a good listener I learned that day when he parked his car on the side of the road just because he wanted to know all about me.

He cares for his loved ones I learned that day when I was ill and puked all over the place because I was unable to control it till the washroom. I was embarrassed but he was not. He not only cleaned the mess I created but he also cleaned me up.

He is an angry person I learned that day when his own best friend told that he is going to break an innocent girl’s heart because he is not ready for marriage any time soon. His temper was the only thing I wish never to see again.

He loves his family and mine too. When I told him about my broken relationship with my father and how many problems we have faced as a family. He didn’t say anything but he assured me to be there till it all come to an end.

It’s been months that I am with him and there is no trace of him or me leaving each other anytime soon.

We may get married or we may not.

But I am happy that I met him. I was never a happy child but after him, I am glad that I met Happiness in person.

He just didn’t give me love, he gave me all I ever desired for. He fights with me like my brother, he cares about me like my own parents. He never allows me leave his sight even if we are home, together.

I stay at my place but it feels good to call his home, our home.

 

Thank You!